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By: Angelica Heidi Brehm. The result, Expechation, was a feeling of deep despair. I felt sucker-punched and like my life force had been pushed out of my body. I hated that feeling. I made the quote my motto and life was good.

My migraine disease, which had been episodic, became chronic when I was 25 years old.

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Over time, the severity and frequency of my symptoms grew and grew until I was no longer able to work and my social life was Expectation Vs Reality Expectation impacted. Adding insult to injury, according to my motto, the fact that I was unhappy was my fault because of how I was choosing to react.

I wanted to be more positive, but the difficulty I had completing tasks was real and it was becoming more and more prevalent. I knew I was trying my hardest so I sought support from family members, peers, and therapists who could help me do better.

When I finally found a therapist who was a good fit for me, I explained that everything was much more challenging than it had been when I was healthy. Things that I thought would take one step, like filling a prescription, took several involved and exhausting steps.

I had no idea that becoming a person with chronic migraine would make me feel like a circus performer who specialized in jumping through hoops. The tasks were supposed to be as feasible as I expected them to be, right? They always had before.

Week after week I shared some of my expectations and described how what I had encountered was so much more difficult. I expected that my primary care provider would be capable of treating my condition.

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I expected that my employer, coworkers, friends, and family would recognize my disability and accommodate my new needs. I expected that I could push through the pain and still do the things I had done before. I expected to feel supported by local specialists and for them to be willing to fill out disability-related paperwork and lobby on my behalf to get me access to treatments. I expected that I could will my depression away.

Unfortunately, those expectations were not based on reality. At least, not the reality in which I lived. My therapist helped me to eventually see my pattern of undertaking a task with an expectation of it being feasible and then feeling sucker-punched when unexpected steps were added. I would struggle to complete them only to have more and more difficult steps revealed. They would be Reqlity and after I completed a step, an unforeseen difficult step would often be uncovered.

This realization led to Expectation Vs Reality Expectation revised expectations. My life is still hard, but now it feels feasible, predictable, and even full of joy and hope.]